Sex & Love Addiction

What is sex & love addiction?

Sex addiction and issues of love addiction can take a number of different forms.

Many people with sex or love addiction issues do not realise their behaviours are problematic or deny the impact of their actions. Honestly asking oneself how you might feel if a partner, family or colleagues knew about the activity may help give some indication as to the issue.

Those who experience compulsive sexual tendencies can often become irritable, angry and quick-tempered. There can often be an attempt at trying to gain some sense of intimacy and physical closeness from active sex addiction.

This is usually followed by feelings of shame, regret and guilt along with a realisation that fleeting ‘closeness’ is unable to offer the deeper sense of emotional connection most sex addicts are actually truly seeking. This can lead to an active addiction highly progressive in nature. This is seen in individuals seeking more and more and with a need for increasingly more dangerous, inappropriate or provocative scenarios in order to maintain and reach a ‘high’.

Needless to say, there are a number of health-related risks for either gender such as violence, rape or contracting sexually transmitted diseases. Once the denial of sex addiction has passed, it is often an incredibly lonely, isolating and alienating place to be.

It is important to understand that the urges and cravings that initiate and maintain sex addiction are very strong. The condition is similar to other addictions including chemical dependency as it operates in the pleasure centre of the brain.

The biochemistry of the brain is altered and the reward pathway is stimulated by increased neurotransmitter activity. Once activated these neurochemical pathways create powerful urges and cravings to keep the cycle alive.

When a person is in the midst of active sex addiction the conscious pleasure has long disappeared and the process has become a pain relief mechanism that is self perpetuating. 

The partners of sex addicts are affected adversely in a very unique way – worry, anxiety, confusion, devastation and betrayal. While there is a lot of pain and mistrust present, the treatment process offers a healing experience and the prospect of recovery.

What are symptoms of sex & love addiction?

As with other obsessive and compulsive conditions, sex and love addiction can be characterised by powerful drives and urges to think, behave or act out in certain ways. This can include:

• the thinking about, planning or pursuit of sexual activities and other issues can include secrecy, adultery, intimacy issues, health-risk behaviours and shame.
• Obsessively using pornography
• use of sex workers, prostitution,
• cheating, meeting strangers for sex
• masturbation in inappropriate places and public exposure are some examples of compulsive acts of sex addicts.
• Fantasy and obsession are commonplace in issues of love addiction.